Added: Aracelis Hendrickson - Date: 16.02.2022 04:29 - Views: 38587 - Clicks: 1984
Jump to. I took a free workshop on the female condom the other day. I guess I should have seen it crouching in the corners of the workshop. It lurked in a chat I had with another woman about my recent post on Trojan Magnums and its trading on the Big Black Penis stereotype. The facilitator said that the female condom is rather strong and has some elasticity. Also, she added, different self-identified women enjoy different sizes, which the condom can definitely accommodate. When aroused the cervix can go up, which lengthens the vagina to about seven inches.
And, like the Big Dick Braggart, the Size Queen is striped with some ugly racialized stereotypes, namely that the only type such a person would want to have sex with is—you guessed it—a black man. As Carmen Van Kerckhove, the departing publisher of Racialicious says, sexual stereotypes, like all stereotypes, flatten our humanity.
Get Bitch Media's top 9 re of the week delivered to your inbox every Saturday morning! As far as i know it wasn't available. As i got older Looking for a true size queen was exposed to different kinds of myths and experiences, but the ones you cite were among them. There were many guys who bragged about their penis size but i later learned that some guys want humiliation in the form of ridicule of the small size of their penis. Recently I read that one could increase elasticity with gentle use, but that leaving something in reduced elasticity. What should i believe? Somewhere i still suspect that someone is trying to prove or disprove everything with studies, most of which probably lack adequate scientific controls.
Can you imagine the outcry if any government entity actually funded a study of anything related to the subject of the post? If there was one would we ever hear about it? I have to agree that an "excellent ability to follow directions" -- and its counterpart, excellent communication abilities -- are the skills to strive for in bed, whatever your gender. On an less serious note, ever since I read the preview to Andrea's post, Looking for a true size queen haven't been able to forget the image of a penis "springing forth. I won't debate with you at all the absurdity of the stereotypes associated with preferring a longer penis; I think we can all agree that's screwed up.
Are we to believe that all women's vaginas are the same? I just don't think that's true. I personally don't identify as a 'size queen'; I'm a little on the small side actually. It seems to me like we have, in western society at least, a bad history of telling women that their understanding of their own bodies is wrong whenever it contradicts the "scientific" assumptions of the times. At one point, female orgasm was a myth, any physical or mental exertion during menstruation was possibly fatal, and the uterus was capable of wandering around in the body.
And now all vaginas are the same length? I would like to see some evidence of that, please. It wouldn't surprise me if that woman went silent because she felt humiliated, not because she was "proven" wrong. After what that other participant said, the perception of the other people would have been that she was either a liar or that her genitals were freakish. Which would you like people to assume, if you were in her position?
I bet she was doing her best to shrink into the shadows just then. And all because she asked a question about her birth control options? She might have a terrible attitude about what her preference means, but body snarking isn't a very helpful way to break down stereotypes. It wouldn't surprise me if the SQ meme was at least partially a defense mechanism in response to this sort of shaming -- a large vagina isn't exactly the mainstream cultural ideal. I think this comment brings up the fact that part of the positive stereotypes thing is that people do build positive self-esteem around them.
I'm sure there are women out there who have, or perceive themselves to have, a large vagina. Perhaps they've learned to feel good about that. However, I'm not sure we should silence concerns about myths such as "Size Queens" in order to prevent them from feeling shamed if they are invested in the Size Queen mythology. As an analogy, I think of whiteness. I'm a white woman and regularly receive compliments about my pale skin. I grew up in the 80s when being tan was The Thing, and it really has been a formative personal battle to swim against that tide to be confident about being pale.
However, what good would it do for me to feel shamed if someone wants to talk about how the value of whiteness, especially female whiteness, is a socially constructed ideal and is often part of a racist narrative deed to devalue women of color? On the one hand, I'd hope that no one would interpret the care I take for my white skin as inherently racist. For me, I stay pale to do what's best for my body, and I do my level best not to buy into the idea that my pale skin is "prettier" or "more natural" than anybody else's skin. On the other hand, it's not really helpful for me to take critiques of whiteness as personal attacks when they aren't.
If anything, wouldn't my potential shame around my "whiteness" in those moments really come from a realization that I was invested in a negative stereotype? Maybe that's a good kind of shame. The kind that gets ya thinkin'. I've stumbled on this much later but I felt that I should comment just for anyone else who might see this. My problem with this post also is that it implies that regardless of the length, a man cannot get more than 7 inches inside a woman. I can for a fact say this is not true.
Although the vagina itself may only be 6 or 7 inches on average, a longer guy who goes further in will continue on until he bumps the cervix which is why if you've had deep sex with a guy who's 8 or 9 inches, you get that uncomfortable pain in your stomach. Also it is not all about girth solely in my opinion, a very thick, but only 3 inches long penis be satisfying to me? Hell no. But a very thin 9 incher isn't that great either but if I had to choose, personally the latter.
And I prefer guys who are at least 8 for that very reason. I love that slight pain I feel when a guy reaches my cervix and I'm thin enough to be able to see my lower stomach right above my pubic bone move up and down with each deep thrust. It's amazing to see and I love it.
The woman's question was highly justified I think anyone with a brain who can think logically would have thought that to be a reason of concern, regardless of if she was asking to put it out there that she's a size queen or not. And why as women do we have to put each other down for admitting to prefer a larger guy for whatever reason?
Men have unashamedly admitting their sexual preferences for years, big boobs, big ass, virgins only, no girl over a size 4. Men get to like what they like, but as women we're size queens who are full of it because our vaginas are only 7 inches?? In the same right shouldn't a man be told liking big boobs or a big butt is silly because their palms are only a specific width? No one says and that and oh yeah some men have bigger hands than others!
Somehow no matter what women end up attacking each other for their sexual preferences, which at the end of the day is just that. A freaking sexual preference. Some women like bigger than average dicks, it doesn't make their vaginas loose, it doesn't make them sluts. The post and majority of responses also imply that these women are shallow and willing to put up with bad sex for the sake of a measurement.
I find it hard to imagine that that is true. You assume a woman who says I like a big dick will shut down every smaller guy, she might but in this life we compromise and if a guy with 7 inches can work it, you enjoy it. Would a woman who prefers an average guy reject a bigger guy to look at the other side? I think not. You compromise. If the person is worth it to you, you learn to work it out so you're both having a good time.
I am also uncircumcised and I have not had many comments Looking for a true size queen all about it from partners, but I have generally slept with women who have a more liberal mindset and are not religious, so perhaps that has something to do with it? I am a west coast white man, born and raised, which might make a difference as well?
I am proud and happy that my mom had the willpower to stand up against the pressures I am sure she faced to have me undergo a procedure that often involves strapping a baby down like a death row inmate. On a more visceral level, I am convinced that part of the great pleasure I derive from sex is due to my possession of a foreskin, which makes the head of my penis much more sensitive that it would otherwise be. As for the toy issue, many of us, men and women, often have moments of sexual vulnerability where we wonder if we are pleasing our partner s.
For men, with how much emphasis society places on The Power of The Penis, I think we can see a toy, whether it is as big as "us", smaller or just includes things our equipment, au natural, never can whirling be, neon colors, platinum Am I not giving her enough orgasms?
Though I think much of that insecurity would vanish if most men could fully wrap their brains around the idea that yes, women also have a need to masturbate, usually Looking for a true size queen less "me" time and often have warped society-induced hangups about touching themselves, all issues that toys can help overcome. After all, as you said yourself, you have only used it a few times, which would imply that most of the time, your boyfriend is the object of your lust. As Dan Savage himself might say, your boyfriend should be happy that you are expressing your perfectly normal sexual curiosity with an inanimate object, rather than seeking out "the real thing" on the side.
Is it more creepy than spending a thousand plus dollars on a precious gem and metals coated vibrator? Myself, I think a hand is a whole lot cheaper than a Annie W-ii Blowdroid, but I guess some guys just need a lot more help with their imagination. I'm so glad that you responded to my post -- it's always great to get other opinions about this stuff. As far as the foreskin issue goes, we've been working through it, and it's been tough at times, but I think that my boyfriend is definitely becoming more comfortable and secure in the fact that his foreskin doesn't bother me one way or another.
At the beginning, he thought that I found it weird or somehow unusual. Granted, he is my first partner to be uncircumcised, but it has never been something that I found uncomfortable or unappealing, and frankly I was interested to see how my sex would be different because of it I don't know if that came through in my initial post I also like that you brought up the toy issue and those insecurities that surround them.
I hate the idea that women enjoying and expressing themselves sexually through masturbation, nonetheless is so taboo. Just because we aren't men Looking for a true size queen mean we aren't human. I go to school in Ohio where our families are ; my boyfriend is stationed in North Carolina woo Army ; as you can imagine, we don't see each other too often, so that has a huge impact on our sexual relationship.
That said, I always try to let him know that just because I have toys doesn't mean that I don't desire him -- quite the contrary; I have them because I DO desire him. But again, these are all things that we are open about, which I love. I suppose the real heart of the matter is communication and being able to talk about these things in a safe, nonthreatening environment, even if some of it is sometime unsettling. The uncircumcised guys certainly are more self conscious over it I mean, I thought it was kind of cool.
But I'm glad you're bringing it up, because that definitely fits in the discourse of what is "normal" and that is a more dangerous game to play than size, in that it involves blood and surgery on people too young to have a say. Thanks so much for this post. I'm so glad someone has voiced concerns over an issue that I have long been wary about. Oh and to add to the annoyance is the fact that whenever I bring this up, someone always chimes in with, "But biologically and statistically speaking, black men ARE bigger I highly reccomend it.
Of course, this isn't a fact, but it's that idea that keeps some adults from telling children about sex Amanda--having had lovers of different races and ethnicities, I can most definitely say that no one group has a corner of big dicks.Looking for a true size queen
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A True Size Queen